Monday, December 03, 2007

Very First Hair Cuts


I've been wondering if anyone would notice and sure enough my good friend from over at Mayhem and Magic (click here) did! She left a comment on my post from earlier today asking about the boys' hair. Yes, indeed, they got their very first hair cuts! I trimmed their dreds. This was a long time coming, the decision had been weighing on me for months (literally!), and it was a big thing for me to finally determine to do it. The boys' locs were getting very long, especially for 3-year-old-rough-and-tumble-boys who really couldn't care less if grass/sand/mud/play dough/cookie dough/jelly/glue/glitter/gum/or slime of any variety gets smeared in their hair. Their locs were so long that we could put both of their hair into full ponytails. We were also letting them wear my headbands sometimes (which they liked, to keep their locs out of their faces). These looks (ponytails, headbands, etc.) were very hip and cool (the boys looked like some of my coolest students do), but not so appropriate for 3 year old boys in our neck of the woods. Their locs were getting very long, and very heavy. And, the real kicker was that Kyle's hair was driving him absolutely batty. The locs in front were growing straight down, no matter what tactics I took to keep them twisted back. And they were hanging straight into his eyes. A bazillion times a day the poor kid was pushing his hair out of his eyes with his hands. It was distracting him from his playing, from his eating, from his craft projects, from everything. Just watching him go through this was killing me. Kyle's annoyance at his locs-in-his-eyes slowly came to outweigh the idea of keeping the locs long because of my own emotional attachment to the idea/symbolism of it. That is what finally pushed me over the edge and made me make the decision to trim. It was an emotional decision for me. Their hair had never been cut. Never ever. I loved it so much that the tips of their locs were their baby hair; their hair from Haiti, from the orphanage. I loved it so much that the end portions of their locs were from when they first came home, the middle portions were their hair from when they were settling-in-with-us, the roots were now, etc., etc., etc. I loved the symbolism. I loved what it represented. And if they were girls and I could do up-do's everyday, or boys who cared more about keeping junk out of their hair, or people who placed any value whatsoever on the length of their locs... well... then I suppose it would have been a different story. But this is Kyle and Owen we're talking about. Finally I bit the bullet. And once I made the decision, that was it. I said, "O.k., boys, Mama is going to cut your hair!! Just a little, you'll still have your dreadlocks, but I'm going to cut them shorter just a little bit!!" and they jumped right up into the chair I had set up in the kitchen. I made a huge production about how "ONLY MAMA CUTS THEIR HAIR! No one else! And definitely not each other-- NO CUTTING YOUR OWN DREADLOCKS!!!!!!!!!" (still, the next morning I caught them right in the nick of time -- both holding scissors in the playroom and about to "cut hair!"). Anyway, the momentous date was Friday, November 23; that was the date of the boys' very first hair cuts. Braydon and I are sooooo glad we finally did it. Their hair looks awesome now and so healthy. And the boys are much, much happier with their hair now.

11 comments:

Mamato2 said...

I actually noticed "something" was a bit different but didn't realize what until this post! Good job, Mama!

Black Wombmyn Chat said...

They look cute!

Renee said...

Oh wow...I felt so emotional reading this!! The way you talked about their hair and their mom touching it! You are right, your emotions don't outweigh their comfort! Thank you for sharing! You are a great Mommy!!
Hugs,
Renee

Anonymous said...

Thanks for answering my question! The boys look great, as always!

Ani said...

They look so handsome! Great job with the hair cuts.

My 2 year old H.A.T.E.S. having his hair cut, which is a huge bummer given that he needs monthly trims. And, there is no way I'm brave enough to take scissors to his head :)

RamblingMother said...

You saved the first hair cut right and all the symbolism of their time in Haiti? Makes for good treasure box or scrap book artifacts.

Beverly

Anonymous said...

Did you keep the hair? I was thinking of how in some Caribbean cultures (including Haiti) it's very meaningful to bury the placenta when a child is born, tying the child for life to their birthplace. I once heard a Caribbean woman in Toronto describe how she froze her daughter's placenta for 2 years until she could transport it back to her native Guyana!

Anyways, it's something to think about. Hair is not the same. But it is a connection to the past, as you've so poignantly expressed.

Bek said...

I also noticed something was different, but didn't figure out that it was the hair.

So cute (and emotional). It looks great, and at the end of the day, it is a matter of what is working for them. If it was in their face all the time, then it was a good time to cut it. You don't want them to hate their hair (as I say this I just finished braiding Miss N's hair and she cried the whole time..... so I should practice what I preach...).

It looks great. Good Job mamma....

junglemama said...

Hope you saved their hair. :) I saved my daughters hair from their first haircut with us.

Wendy said...

They are just as cute as ever!

Anonymous said...

Hello, It's Mary Johnson...I have an african american daughter named Gabrielle, I did the same to her hair when she was 2. I love it and especially for little girls, now she doesnt have to sit through all the weekly hair care and sleep on tons of balls! Anyways I wrote before to you both and I now have a website up, I make jewelry for dreadlocs, just because I wasn't able to find anything for her hair. So I doubt the boys would wearn them (hehehe) but it may be useful for some with little girls. I want to add your site to my list of related sites if thats ok with you. Please check out my website and tell me what you think. Also maybe you can add me somewhere in your site to help me out with mines :) Write me back when you get a moment to maryjohnson007@comcast.net and the website is > www.rastababyjewels.com
thank you and many blessings to your family!