A Real Diss

Tonight while we were eating dinner Kyle was talking like crazy, as usual. The three of us (Braydon, Owen, and I) basically just sit there and listen as Kyle chitter chats his way through the meal-- leaving barely any chance for any of the rest of us to get a word in edgewise. Somehow, miraculously, the boy also manages to eat 5 times more and 10 times more quickly than any of the other three of us (even though he's also the only one talking). It is quite the sight. Anyway, he was talking, talking, talking. Telling us stories about the day, the gossip of the Acorn Room, fabricating some things (clearly going on tangents of wild imagination), and giving non-fictional factual details regarding some other things. At one point he was telling us all about some big drama that occurred today while he was playing outside at school. Something about being in the woods, and fighting with Stella over a shovel. The story was coming to a climax, he was getting very animated, and he goes: "I hided the shovel in the woods so that Stella couldn't finded it! I hided it in the woods!!! And then she finded it and she tooked it away!!!" (he says this like it was the biggest act of treason Stella could have ever inflicted upon him) "I was crying and crying because she took that shovel!!! And Stella! Stella was in a bad mood to me! Stella was in a very bad mood to me! I said, 'No Stella! No thank you! I was playing with that shovel!' but she just took that shovel away! She was in a bad mood to me!" At this point I said, "Wow, so what did you do Kyle?" He says, "I said, 'Stella! Stella! You are doing bad behavior! At my birthday party you will be last!!!!!!'" (inside scoop: in current-Kyle-talk this translates to: 'At my birthday party you will be last in line when we are all marching around with instruments like a marching band' -- note: in his present-day soon-to-have-a-4-year-old-birthday-party-life, this is about the biggest diss that Kyle could possibly say to/about anyone). Braydon had to put his napkin up to his face to hide that he was bursting out laughing; Owen was just in his own little world eating his shrimp scampi. I said, "Wow, Kyle, you said that to Stella???" (just shocked that he would say something that -- at least in his own mind -- is sooo nasty to one of his friends). "No mommy! I didn't say it to her! I said it in my own mind! I said it inside my own mind! Because Stella was in a very bad mood to me, so Stella is going to be LAST at my birthday party! She will be BEHIND Will! And she will be LAST!!!! O.k., mommy? O.k.?"