Saturday, May 09, 2009

The 5th Birthday is Done


Yesterday morning, before we left for Kyle and Owen's "School Birthday," as I was cutting up two large containers of strawberries to go with two sets of 24 cupcakes for two classrooms full of kids, I was reminded of how much more work it is to have twins. Now that we have Meera, and are experiencing life with a baby who is not a twin, my awareness of the twin-related-stuff has risen to a whole new level. Everything is just so much more with twins. More, literally. But more in a sort of figurative sense too. Since K & O arrived on the scene here I've always thought that twins are not just 'times two,' they are infinitely more than 'times two.' The whole of twinship is so much larger than the sum of the parts. I simply cannot imagine triplets or quadruplets, or -- heaven help them! -- Jon & Kate Plus 8 sorts of scenarios. I guess you do what you gotta do. And you do get used to it. But really, it is a lot. I go for long stretches of time now when I don't really think too much about twin stuff. But then a day like yesterday comes along and I'm just sort of blown away, once again, at not just the fact that I have twins, but at all that is wrapped up with that. But today, all I can feel is relief that our 5th birthday for twin boys is finally over. I mean, the 5th birthday is a biggie to begin with (for the past five years I've been hearing parents talk about how big the 5th birthday is, and now I know!), but with twins -- and larger-than-life twin boys at at that -- well, it is all just kind of over the top. And yes, I take full responsibility for definitely doing it that way (it is just my nature; I do nothing half-way... especially my boys' birthday!), but it is also just plain big, period. And now, after a week-long-birthday-marathon, it is finally done. Thank goodness because I don't think that any of us could take it much longer. But amidst all the frenzy and hype and never-ending-excitement that was the 5th Birthday, there were moments of peace and quiet and reflection. This was the first year that K & O really fully totally got it (which is why, after all, the 5th birthday is so big for kids). They completely understand now that we celebrate birthdays to mark the annual date of a person's birth. They also understand quite a lot about their own histories and birth stories. And in Waldorf schools, kindergarten birthdays (ages 5, 6, 7 or so), are deeply revered and during those years each child receives a very personal ceremony to honor and reflect upon the day of their birth. Kyle and Owen's teachers did a truly magnificent job of telling their birth stories with both a sense of honesty and a sense of joy (not an easy task for a teacher with a situation like K & O's). And Kyle and Owen handled it beautifully (which is a lot for a five year old: to have their closest peers truly hear about their stories of Haiti, adoption, loss, and gain). It was all so incredibly moving and brilliant and beautiful that I have a hard time putting words to it. But I will say this, the "School Birthdays" were the perfect way to end a crazy 5th-Birthday-week. And at the end of it all, I think the following little story not only epitomizes the 5th Birthday that we had, but also epitomizes why, for me, it is all worth it~~
We used the '5' cake candles many times over the past week. Sticking them in leftover pieces of cake, in bowls of ice cream, and -- on the morning of their actual birthday -- in blueberry muffins. K & O have blown out those candles at least five times now and each time they've done it with gusto. They know to silently "make a wish" before blowing out the candles, and I've seen them stop and pause (clearly 'wishing') before blowing them out each and every time. But yesterday morning, for whatever reason, before blowing out the candles, they both said aloud the wish that they had been re-wishing each time they've been blowing out those candles for the past week. And hearing it made me pause and remember how much it is all worth it.
Kyle: "I wish that I can have this good family forever and ever."
Owen: "I wish that I will have my beautiful brother for always."

6 comments:

MorMor said...

Oh my gosh... I'll probably continue crying all morning thinking about the love Kyle and Owen have for their family and each other. Beautiful. You are wonderful parents Heather and Braydon. Wow.

ShannonC said...

ya made me cry on a Saturday...

Gail said...

The tears are making it hard for me to type. The wishes are such a tribute to you and Braydon. What a blessing.

Gail

Mark and Sarah said...

Tears here too...their wishes are so moving.

M3 said...

Happy birthday Owen and Kyle! (And yes, definitely more than "times two" oh so much more..."

Kristen said...

Just stopping by to wish you a Happy Mother's Day, Heather! Hope you guys had a great day!

Kristen